First Old Notebook Entry

Its late. I should be sleeping. But once again, as usual, Im not tired. Even though I probably am tired, I just cant stop my brain.

I have to be up at 6:15...well that is when my alarm goes off. I usually wont get up until almost 7, which sucks because then I am in a rush. Then I cant look my best...and I usually show up late.

Yes, this is a habbit I need to break.



So, I am single. Hmmm...I stared at the word 'single' for a while just now. Not only am I single...but Im damaged and single. That sucks.

Today is Monday night. I have to see him again for the first time since we broke up next Wednesday. (we broke up Aug 27)

Not sure how that is going to be.

Honestly, thinking about him just makes me numb. Looking at his pictures its like I feel nothing. I think its because he just feels like a completely different person to me now. I should miss him, but there is no 'him'. He, the guy I knew, isn't there.

Its been just over a month and he is already in another relationship. Haha

I just laughed to myself.

I think that their 'relationship' is ultimately going to fail. But is that just me hoping? Or wishing?

I dont know.

Obviously I dont know anything. Im just a girl who has been lied to and cheated on, Lol.
There are countless girls out there going through this. Im nothing to be pittied. I dont pitty me.
I pitty him.
Im still really close with his sister...is that smart? I dont know...but I love her terribly!

Its weird. One moment you can picture your future, and the next...you have no idea.

"Carpe Diem"

-K